How To Attract What You Want

You’ve probably heard of the Law of Attraction which asserts that you attract into your life what you are focused on. If you are focused on success, you will be successful. 

Do you want to lose weight? Then focus on having a lighter body. By focusing on being miserable, you will be miserable.

This article challenges your beliefs and explains how a change in mindset can get the Law of Attraction to work in your favor so you can begin to attract what you want.

If you watch your thoughts, you will notice that your mind goes to what you have and what you have had, to what you are experiencing or have experienced, and to what you don’t want but can’t seem to stop getting.

You are programmed to focus on these thoughts automatically. They just keep looping.

Unless you change those programmed expectations, the automatic-ness of it takes over and attracts just what you have been getting – just what you expect to keep getting.

So, The Law of Attraction doesn’t work. Right? So it seems.

What if you could change your program? How would you do that?

The program I’m referring to is a set of beliefs. The only way past a belief is through it.

Not by avoiding it. 

For example, go through the belief, “bad things happen to me.”

When that is the lens through which you view life, (if that is what you automatically focus on) you will see only evidence that it’s true. So, you get to be right. 

The Thought that Saved you Rules your Kingdom

When you crown a thought as the truth, it takes over. Since it lives in you like the truth, you start building a life around it. You feed it, clothe it, keep it warm, protect it. Ultimately, you become its servant.

At some point, the thought was the best explanation you could come up with for the messed-upped-ness of life. The thought saved you by giving you some hope and a sense of control. 

That’s what we do when life rolls over us. We get scared and try to find something to hold on to. Something we can use to help us get back up again. Why did it happen in the first place? Why did I get rolled over? Oh, because I wasn’t paying enough attention and because I didn’t realize that bad things happen to me if I don’t pay attention. Now I know. Bad things happen to me.

So you start paying more attention. You become watchful. Vigilant. Careful. Life becomes a chess game, and you are three moves ahead of it. Then, when life serves up that bad thing – when the steamroller comes by again, you can avoid it. But in avoiding that bad thing you saw coming, you step into the path of that bus you didn’t see coming. Which proves you were right. Bad things happen to you unless you pay even more attention. Take fewer risks and don’t trust anyone. Make yourself a smaller target.

Challenging Your Truths

Time for a de-throning. Just seeing that you are the servant of the thought begins to loosen the grip of the tyrant. But the thought is true… right?

What if it’s not even true? Sure – the thought helped you survive when it first came to you.  But was it ever actually true? You believed it was. It was your best guess to explain what happened. Time to look again. Is it true now? Today? At this moment? What if you could break out of your self-imposed prison? Who would you be in your life if you didn’t believe that bad things happen to you?

What if you started looking for evidence that “bad things happen to me” isn’t the truth? Could you find proof that good things happen to you? Like being supported. How are you supported, right now, at this moment?

Gravity. It’s holding you to the planet. Our home is a ball in the sky that is traveling 67,000 miles per hour and spinning at a rate of 450 meters per second. Why aren’t you getting flung off of the planet? Your friend, gravity is supporting you.

Then there's oxygen. It’s free. And the earth’s atmosphere holds 20.9% of it. All you have to do is breathe it. And if you are in good health, your body is doing that for you.

It looks like there is some evidence that good things happen to you.

What’s good? What’s bad? Look at what you think. What have you crowned as the truth? What prison have you built for yourself?

How To Attract Something Different in Life

To attract something different than what you have been getting, change the lens through which you view life. Just painting over rust doesn’t change anything. You still have a rust problem. It just looks better for a while.

Thinking positive thoughts doesn’t change what you believe. And what you believe forms the lens through which you view life. Maybe there’s more to this whole Law of Attraction thing than you previously thought.

To change a belief, notice your thoughts about what is happening in your life. Look around and look at life as it is for you. If there is rust, own it. Now, what are your judgments when you notice the rust? Those judgments are the thoughts that you think. And unless you question those thoughts, you will believe them.

Your judgments about the reality of your life create that reality.

I’ve looked around for years and have not been able to find an “off” button for judgment. I can’t just shut it off. I judge. We judge. Our judgments are clues; symptoms of our beliefs. Let’s start there. To change a belief, list your judgments, your interpretations, and your stories about the rust in your life. Creating these lists will begin to cut the rust out. When you see that what you have believed is just an interpretation of what is happening, space is created for reality to show up as it is.

So you aren’t changing a belief. You are exposing it as the fraud it is and setting yourself free from all you do in your life to accommodate it. Freedom. What do you do with that?

Are you ready to change your beliefs and mindset to attract more freedom into your life to be the person you deserve to be? Clear away the cobwebs of dread and start thinking about your ideal life. 

Challenge your thoughts and beliefs. Are they even true?

Two of my preferred methods for changing thoughts and beliefs are The Work of Byron Katie and the Internal Family Systems model (IFS). Internal Family Systems coaching helps individuals explore their internal beliefs and thought patterns to bring about lasting change.

To learn more about The Work of Byron Katie, go to www.TheWork.com

To learn more about IFS, go to www.IFS-Institute.com